June 23, 2008


I have been dreading today, because I knew that I would be struggling with tomorrow's Spring Brand Direction 09. And I have not been exactly working on it as I should have. Procrastinating as usual (how do we deal with that?).

So, today I spent the whole day on the thing. And can I just say.. THANK GOD! for trend forecasters!

I'm now ready to tackle tomorrow. Thank You, Lord!

June 18, 2008

Wiping the slate clean

While making my usual weekly store visit at Pondok Indah Mall today, I had a sudden craving for Yogen Fruz crepes. I ordered a choco banana cheese crepe (without thinking of the calories involved) and watched the lady as she prepped all that’s necessary to whip up my order.

Crepes are made on a hot plate of black steel. First she dropped just a ladle-full of liquid-y dough, and slowly moved a little broom-like stick on top of it in circular movements, making it cover the surface of the entire round steel plate. She was supposed to wait a few moments before she could put the toppings on it. But the crepe cracked. She tried to mend it, but instead the crack grew bigger and it suddenly ripped. Finally, she had to tear the crepe away from the steel plate and started the same process again. But before she put the dough on it, she wiped the remaining dough – all crispy and burnt – with a wet cloth, leaving the steel plate in the right temperature to start again.

Seeing this had me begin to think about new relationships and old broken hearts.

When in a relationship, we feel as though our whole lives revolve around that one person who we deeply adore. We show our love by clinging on, holding on tightly and never letting go. We cover ourselves with that one person. Time passes and the relationship gets hotter. But when it cracks, and there was no way to salvage the remains of the relationship, we end up with nothing but a crispy, burnt, and broken heart.

I wish that getting over a failed relationship is as easy as removing the dough remains with a wet cloth. Wiping the slate clean is easier said than done. The memories that we have of the pain, and the foolishness that we’ve had to deal with in the past have kept us from moving on. Even when we do, sometimes we may find ourselves lost in fear and confusion. We may find ourselves swirling around in a never-ending whirlpool of negative thoughts. It takes more than a wet cloth to remove all the memories of the person who used to make you feel safe and loved. It takes a little more “oomph” to tear the pieces of those who used to cover your life, away from you.

But don’t allow yourself to be stuck in the past. It’s time to wipe the slate clean. Prep your heart for a new relationship. Let is start on a smooth clean surface. Reach out for what you believe in. Be fair. Trust in the person you love and have faith in them enough to know that they wouldn’t do anything to hurt you. Maybe time will heal, and maybe love will prevail. Or maybe it won’t. But muster up enough courage simply to take that risk.

And as alike as it maybe in theory, wiping away pain from your hearts is not as easy as removing crepe dough remains. After all, our hearts are not made of steel.

June 17, 2008

A Corporate Life

"The only time success comes before work is in the dictionary" - Vidal Sassoon

So, hooray for endless meetings and revised sales plans. And caffein. Lots of caffein.

June 16, 2008

Movie Madness

I'm waiting outside Pondok Indah XXI. Tickets for Kungfu Panda is totally sold out. Is it because everyone is so into Kungfu, or is it because of school holidays and noone knows what to do?

So, if we were to choose a later show, we just might get lucky. Afterall, these kids should still have curfew don't they?

Anyway, I'm just really psyched because I can finally go online on my mobile.

Shall we go and see the Premiere instead?

An ode to Husband

100 Things I love about you!

1. I love that you put your family above anything else
2. I love that you value your principles
3. I love that you call your families for no apparent reasons
4. I love that you love your mother so much
5. I love that you think your family is worth a thousand words
6. I love how you always tell people that you’re the shortest in the family
7. I love that you make me laugh
8. I love that you stayed with me the whole time during Marcia’s delivery
9. I love that you made me laugh so hard when I was actually that nervous!
10. I love that you could sleep so well on that pathetic excuse for a bed in the delivery room
11. I love that you love Marcia so much
12. I love to see you cuddle and play with her
13. I love to see that huge grin on your face when you do
14. I love that you could be such a silly father
15. I love that you love God
16. I love that you believe in His work in your life, and have faith in His plans for you
17. I love that I believe you will open a school one day
18. I love that you’re trully committed to your work
19. I love that no matter what you do, you’re always 100% excited!
20. I love to see you in your worn out t-shirt and shorts in front of the TV
21. I love that even though you forget to eat when your busy, you do so when I remind you
22. I love that you never forget your snacks whenever we go shopping
23. I love that you’re fussy about your food, although it confuses me at times
24. I love that help to do things around the house, like wiring and stuff
25. I love that you take me almost everywhere I need to go to do my errands
26. I love that you love staying at home
27. I love that you can stay in your study and fiddle around with your laptop for hours
28. I love that even though you’re tired, you always find the time to watch movies
29. I love that you can stay up at night
30. I love it because it gives me the chance to show you how much I love you by waking you up each morning (without fail!)
31. I love that it makes me the earlier riser (hihi!)
32. I love that you’re a movie freak
33. I love that you always take me to go to the movies
34. I love that we always have dinner after that
35. I love that you stuff me up with the snacking during the movies before that
36. I love that you still love me even though my weight is uncontrollable
37. I love you even more because I think you play a big part in my weight gain (haha!)
38. I love that you like helping people
39. I love that even if it goes out of your way, you still help them anyway
40. I love that you take cold drinks before you go to the car
41. I love that you take cold drinks almost everywhere you are
42. I love that you make sure of my happiness and comfort
43. I love that even though I complain a lot, you still put up with me anyway
44. I love that you’re an “underground” gadget freak
45. I love that you fixed my computer
46. I love that I never have to worry about anything techie in my life because you always do
47. I love that you burn me CDs
48. I love that music is a huge part of who you are
49. I love that you love to sing without care
50. I love that you can sing songs which you don’t even know the meaning of
51. I love that you were in a band
52. I love that you love Christian music
53. I love that you have such admiration for Jacky Cheung
54. I love that you took me to his concert for your very first time
55. I love that we had our honeymoon in Australia
56. I love that you showed me your favorite eating place
57. I love that we significantly got heavier together during that time
58. I love that you are a collector
59. I love that you collect even the smallest thing, although I can’t always understand why
60. I love that you can talk about your trading cards for hours, even though sometimes I don’t really get what you’re so excited about
61. I love that you regularly check your card values on E-Bay
62. I love that you love to buy small things from eBay even though sometimes I think it’s a waste
63. I love that you don’t make a fuss about my shoes obsession even though I know you think that’s a waste
64. I love that you don’t make a fuss about my bags, clothes, and shopping obsessions either
65. I love that you tried to quite smoking
66. I’m sure I’ll love you even more when we really actually do quit together
67. I love that you can get along with my friends
68. I love that you shared all your past-time memories with me
69. I love that you never really mention your exes because you know that it will annoy me
70. I love that you always take my feelings into consideration
71. I love how you try so hard to always make me happy
72. I love that you adjusted so well into our relationship
73. I love that you have changed so much ever since we got together
74. I love that you still keep your good qualities that made me fell in love with you
75. I love that you take things seriously – sometimes too seriously
76. I love how you ask for my opinion for different perspective
77. I love how you always take my opinions for considerations
78. I love that you put up with my family – I know they can be a lot to handle
79. I love that you adjusted well into our family
80. I love that you understand how different our backgrounds are
81. I love that you’re always open to new things
82. I love that you’re always more open than me
83. I love that you constantly remind me to have an open mind
84. I love how you continously apply the “corporate values” in every sentence for a week after your training at Pancawati
85. I love that you called me from Pancawati even though it was really late
86. I love that you understand how important it is for us to talk everyday
87. I love that you make an effort to call me because you know how I feel about it
88. I love that you can make me jump for joy whenever I receive a call from you
89. I love that you started out on making the “100 things” about me
90. I love that you include me in every aspect of your life
91. I love that you share everything with me and that I can share anything with you
92. I love that you are truly my best friend in the entire world
93. I love how you make me feel good about myself
94. I love that you made me so attached to you
95. I love that you showed me what it feels like to love like this
96. I love that making this list was not as hard as I thought it would me
97. I love that it showed me that there are at least 100 things I love about you
98. I love knowing that nothing could ever change how we feel about each other
99. I love knowing that you will be with me for always
100. I love YOU... just for being you.


It's 4pm already. Hubby is already rushing me to get out of the office for a meeting. And I feel like I haven't done anything yet. What the hell have I been doing? Have I been secretly sleeping while time is flying past?

There's actually so much to tell. So much to write.

Oh well, let's just hope that I can finally go online from my super cool new phone. Hooray!

June 9, 2008

Panic Monday!

I feel like I've been chased around by demons. Is it because I don't know how to do my job, or just everything gets messed up no matter how I did my job? I can't stand that everything is too complicated.

I need to focus. Maybe that will help.

Wish me luck.

June 5, 2008


Guess where I am. On my front porch. Watching the rain. Total cliche.

I just got back from my parent's place to pick up my daughter. Mom was bragging about what new smarts the kid showed today. It kills me to know that I wasn't the first one to know. Apparently, she ate chicken today. And she loved it. Even though I explicitly asked Mom not to introduce chicken to the kid's diet yet. But I wasn't there. I had no choice.

I need to do something. I need to take control, draw the line. In my head, it would be so lovely. No one telling me what to do. Me and hubby raising the kid just how I want to. Noone pressuring me with thoughts about just how sucky a mother I turned out to be. I just want to pack up my bags and leave. Build a family (I thought that's what I'm supposed to be doing now, but noooo....)

This has been going on for too long. But as they say: you can't change anyone but yourself.

So, here's to the very little privacy in the extended Asian family culture who don't really let one be independent. Here's to believing that everything is normal and under-control. Here's to hoping that we'll finally find our place in the world. Here's to a new mindset.

Here's to the raindrops falling on my head. Hear, hear!

Aha.. Romance!

Hey, look what I found while clearing up my laptop.

Here's my wedding vow, said to my husband about 1 1/2 years ago.

My dearest Takna,

As cliché as it may sound, no words can ever describe how much you mean to me.
You saw me in the dark, took my hand and led me into the light.
I am a better person because of you.

You love me even when I’m being childish and incredibly selfish. You understand me even when I’m being unreasonable. Most of all, you gave yourself wholeheartedly without knowing what the future holds.

There are some things that I will never be, but there are also some things that will always be.
I cannot promise you that I will never change
But whatever I am and whoever I become, I promise to love you with all my heart.
I dedicate my life to you as a true story of hope, love, and faith.

I thank God for this wonderful gift of you.
You are my best friend, my partner, my world.
My life is complete because I have you, to love and to cherish, now and forevermore.

Yes - it was an event worth remembering eternally. I cried the whole entire time when I said this. If I could do it all over again, I wish I didn't have to sound like someone being forced to marry an 98-year-old man who live in a shoe with 20 kids and 30 grandkids. Geezzzz...

But all and all, it was a seriously touchy moment.

Lazying around again?

My God - when will I ever get any work done? It's not as if I've got nothing to do. I think I'm just. plain. lazy.

Ok, enough of this blogger thing.

Now on to some work!

A New Beginning

I don't know what happened to my old blog. I guess it's been finally deleted from the cyber world. Thankfully, I still have my old writings saved in my trusty laptop.

Oh well, it's been too long anyway. Today is a good time for a fresh start.

Stay positive. I hope to master this art called blogging.